Abuse comes in many forms and leaves emotional scars including low self image, low self esteem and self worth and difficulties in relationships (with trust & safety). Abuse is about control, power, aggression, advantage taking and manipulation (on the part of the abuser) and vulnerability & isolation on the part of the abusee.

Sexual Abuse

This can involve coercion, persuasion and manipulation (grooming) as well as force. Refusing to have a sexual relationship with a life partner but not wanting them to have a sexual relationship with anyone else and effectively forcing them to be celibate can also constitute abuse.

Physical Abuse and Domestic Violence

Actual physical violence including pushing as well as throwing things at the other person with intent to harm, as well as direct or indirect threats of harm to the person, belongings and others.

Emotional

Including regular direct or indirect put downs, unfavourable comparisons, sarcastic comments and refusal of requests to resolve problems. Emotional abuse also includes lack of appropriate support.

Neglect

Neglecting someone includes ignoring them and not validating or acknowledging their needs.

Financial

Withholding or controlling money within a relationship. Denying the other from reasonable spending on themselves or the home for example. Pressurising others into handing over their money, savings or inheritance for “investments” or to be used for someone else’s (usually the abusers) benefit.

Professional help enables you to recognise what has been happening and realise that you have choices. It also helps to re-build confidence and make changes to prevent other abusive situations occurring in the future.